I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”

And, lo, did the prescriptivist speak such words of English teachers past; “Thou must ne’er propose thy state of being as “good”. For doth thou not know? T’is an unintelligible phrase and slang of this sort shallt kill the minds of youth.
Thus ne’er speakest thou of Shakespeare! For t’is he whom makes nonsense with such words as “goodbye” and “elbow”. How exactly, William, art thou in a pickle?






Behold. South Park changing the derogatory definition of ‘fag.’ Making it synonymous with moron, jackass and douchebag.

Once the old homophobic preachers die out and a generations passes, we’ll be left with this lovely urban definition:

“Fag, noun. Used to describe someone acting with poor, rude and unintelligent behaviour.” 

South Park is perfect

You know there is a problem when South Park does a better job in realizing the mutability of language than most adults.

I’m waiting for someone to get angry.

(Source: membersonlyguy)

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